Monday, March 26, 2012

An Ode to Jordan Bloom (And His Miami Workshop)

Anusara Yoga extraordinaire Jordan Bloom will be in the Grove tomorrow night giving a master class at Dharma Studio. The class, titled, "What's Love Got To Do With It?" promises to, "invoke the most sublime and simplest teaching as a metaphor for how we can align our lives..."

When we heard about the workshop this morning, we didn't know who Jordan Bloom was. One quick Google Image search told us everything we needed to know about him - that we are in love with him and he must never, ever leave Miami.

We nearly choked on our Kombucha. This guy is wildly good looking. We were going to do a video search but weren't sure if we could handle it. We still don't have the courage.

So with all due respect to the Anusara lineage, wealth of knowledge we are sure he is bringing to the table and to all yogis and yoga teachers alike we will continue with our Ode to Jordan Bloom.

He's like a real life Ken Doll that came alive and started teaching yoga. We would consider attending his workshop at Dharma Studio tomorrow but are afraid that we would spend a majority of the class curled up in a ball crying on our mat over how good looking he is.

Like a mythical yoga beast, he shall remain to exist only in our mind because we don’t think we can handle him in real life. Upon making eye contact with him, we're sure we would immediately enter Samahdi.

Why isn't he wearing a shirt? And can he please take off his pants, too?

Okay, we're going to force ourselves to stop typing now. You all go to the workshop, take lots of photos and email them to us so we can add them to the poster collection we just started of him on our bedroom wall.

Click here to get the deets on the worshop, click the Jump! for more photos, which we have lovingly captioned with all of our hopes and dreams.

We wish we were sunlight.

Those are our fingers, in the lower left.

This song is playing in the background.


Anonymous said...

You have got to be joking right? Get your yoga on and be more respectful to Jordan and to the world of yoga that has had so much bad press recently over sex scandals. Common decency should make you re-read this blog, take a breath, and revisit the yamas and niyamas of the Yoga Sutras.

Can't be bothered? then stop blogging

Namaste Miami said...

We're sorry you can't let this go. We offered to remove the post at Jordan's request if he wanted - all he has to do is shoot us an email. It is a joke - and if you don't find it funny, then simply cultivate an attitude of indifference and stop reading our blog.

Enlighten up. Namaste.